Do you think I am going to help anybody? No! Oh, no, no, no, no, no! Don't expect me to be of help to anyone. Nor do I expect to damage anyone. If you are damaged, you did it; and if you are helped, you did it. You really did! You think people help you? They don't. You think people support you? They don't.  There was a woman in a therapy group I was conducting once. She was a religious sister. She said to me, "I don't feel supported by my superior." So I said, "What do you mean by that?" And she said, "Well, my superior, the provincial superior, never shows up at the novitiate where I am in charge, never. She never says a word of appreciation." I said to her, "All right let's do a little role playing. Pretend I know your provincial superior. In fact, pretend I know exactly what she thinks about you. So I say to you (acting the part of the provincial superior), 'You know, Mary, the reason I don't come to that place you'r...

The first thing you need to do is get in touch with negative feelings that you're not even aware of. Lots of people have negative feelings they're not aware of. Lots of people are depressed and they're not aware they are depressed. It's only when they make contact with joy that they understand how depressed they were. You can't deal with a cancer that you haven't detected. You can't get rid of boll weevils on your farm if you're not aware of their existence. The first thing you need is awareness of your negative feelings. What negative feelings? Gloominess, for instance. You're feeling gloomy and moody. You feel self-hatred or guilt. You feel that life is pointless, that it makes no sense; you've got hurt feelings, you're feeling nervous and tense. Get in touch with those feelings first.  The second step (this is a four-step program) is to understand that the feeling is in you, not in reality. That's such a self-evident thing, but do you ...

To a disciple who was obsessed with the thought of life after death, the Master said, "Why waste a single moment thinking of the hereafter?" "But is it possible not to?" "Yes." "How?" "By living in heaven here and now." "And where is this heaven?" "In the here and now."

  Celebration and praise, loving attention to the presence of God, become more important than "asking for" things and "getting for" things and "getting" things.   Contemplation in a World of Action: 159

When it comes to our development, when it comes to real change, the long, slow, boring and often painful route is quite reliably,  the most direct.

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed people can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has."      - Margaret Meade , was an American cultural anthropologist.

Rule of Life is an intentional pattern of spiritual disciplines that provides structure and  direction for growth in holiness.  A Rule establishes a rhythm for life in which is helpful for  being formed by the Spirit, a rhythm that reflects a love for God and respect for how he has made  us.  The disciplines which we build into our rhythm of life help us to shed the “old self” and  allow our “new self” in Christ to be formed.  Spiritual disciplines are means of grace by which  God can nourish us.  Ultimately a Rule should help you to love God more, so if it becomes a  legalistic way of earning points with God or impressing others, it should be scrapped.  If the  traditional, ancient term “rule” concerns you because it sounds legalistic, think of “rule” as a  “rhythm of life” or as a “Curriculum in Christlikeness” (Dallas Willard), or as a “Game P...